Haven't been updating my blog 'cos I have been going out and to work, so kinda busy and all. The day that left a greater impression in my mind during the past week was Thursday. I met my good friend, Sel for dinner. After that, while looking for a nice place to chill, we passed by Rouge. Were kinda talking about it, so we decided to take a look inside. Both of us ended up signing up for the membership since it's obviously more worth it than paying the cover charge. Greeeaaattt place! Music was cool! Atmosphere was even cooler! It's kinda different from the average clubs. I enjoyed it, definitely will go back there again. Hope that someone will be able to go with me next week.... Sel enquired about part time vacancies there, had an interview the next day. Think she's still waiting for the response. Oh, congrats to my dear dear friend for passing her driving finally!!! Keke, she was so super happie about it. Glad for her too. Wonder when I'll ever start to embark on that. :roll: There was also a change in the manpower, or should I say girlpower, allocation of the guinness promotion. The agent pleaded with me to help out at Yishun this weekend. I had initially turned down the offer to be permanently stationed there 'cos it takes me about 45 mins to get there by train. She promised to reallocate me next week Shall go down to the agency to ask about it tomorrow when I hand in my timesheets. Despite the long journey to work, I actually enjoyed the time at Northpoint Cold Storage. The staff there were a lot friendier than my previous location and most importantly, there's another Tiger promoter standing beside me, so we kinda chatted all the way. Kekeke....The supervisors do not really care about us at all. Shiok! I was all alone previously. Now, it isn't that bad. Furthermore, the both of us could click. She's also an NUS undergrad from Law, but younger than me by 2 years. So...I MAY decide to stay there if no one has been allocateed permanently to that location. Well, shall see how tomorrow. Just came home from church service. Got about an hour to rest before going to work again later.
I had work as usual. But at the end of the day, I was fuming. The bloody store supervisor seems to think that his guinness stout(6 pack) is damn easy to sell.. wtf...I sold 11 of them and he said, "Only?" Gosh, no one would even touch his guinness stout if not for me. They will still be in cartons of 24 and no one would have bothered to open them up. Carlbergs and Tiger are moving off the shelf like mad, where I'm located. Beer and stout are two different things. I can't possibly force a beer drinker to take stout instead rite! And the 6 pack is bloody expensive! $23.40! Definitely one of the most expensive on the shelf.. I pride on my sales, and I think I have done pretty well. Don't expect to be given credit or praise, but I would like to be respected at least. Moreover, I do not work for the supermarket. I'm directly under the brewery company and only answerable to them. Only sent to the supermarket to help promote sales. The management is not supposed to pay me. So what the heck do they have to complain for free services???? Besides, why are sales promoters required? Precisely 'cos the stock isn't moving off the shelf... And my job scope was explained to me carefully. I'm not required to PULL sales. Only required to inform customers of the gift promotion when they come around to look at my stout! If I wanted to pull sales, I might as well agree to work in the pubs or bars, where it makes more sense. So he thinks it's that easy to sell his stout, then let him do it...Asshole! I put in a 101% effort, and I still get this shit. Fine, fire me for all I care. I seriously do not mind...It's just a temp job for me to pass time anyway
Well, I got the job as the Guinness promoter. Had to wear a uniform, but it's just a T-shirt and a flare skirt, that's almost knee length for me, so it's okie. It's quite troublesome to get to the place I'm posted to. Gotta switch two buses. My first day was fine, just that it's quite boring standing there when there are no one interested. Well, I guess that's the life of a sales promoter. Didn't do too badly. Or rather, I had reasonable luck with sales on the first day. Of course, I had my fair share of blunders too... :roll: Hope no one remembers them after yesterday. I found a new friend while waiting for the finalisation of the locations at the agency. It's such a coincidence. We found out that we actually spoke to each other in the past when we were working around the same area! It's a small small world...At my workplace, however, I didn't interact with my colleagues. They seemed really busy and I knock off before they do too. I would like it if I got to know some of them, but, if I didn't, at the end of the assignment, it's fine with me too. Sounds a bit unfriendly, eh? Well, I am only gonna be there 3 times a week afterall, Thankfully..... :wink:
[i]When I lay in bed at night, I always hear this song being played. It accompanied me when I'm sad, as it explains my thoughts and feelings sometimes. Just wanted to share with others..[/i]
[b]Burn By Usher[/b]
[Intro] I don't understand why See it's burning me to hold onto this I know this is something I gotta do But that don't mean I want to What I'm trying to say is that I-love-you I just I feel like this is coming to an end And its better for me to let it go now than hold on and hurt you I gotta let it burn
[Verse 1] It's gonna burn for me to say this But it's comin from my heart It's been a long time coming But we done been fell apart Really wanna work this out But I don't think you're gonna change I do but you don't Think it's best we go our separate ways Tell me why I should stay in this relationship When I'm hurting baby, I ain't happy baby Plus theres so many other things I gotta deal with I think that you should let it burn
[Chorus] When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to Even though this might ruin you Let it burn Let it burn Gotta let it burn
Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you Hate the thought of her being with someone else But you know that it's over We know that it's through Let it burn Let it burn Gotta let it burn
[Verse 2] Sendin' pages I ain't supposed to Got somebody here but I want you Cause the feelin ain't the same by myself Callin' her your name Ladies tell me do you understand? Now all my fellas do you feel my pain? It's the way I feel I know I made a mistake Now it's too late I know she ain't comin back What I gotta do now To get my shorty back Ooo ooo ooo ooooh Man I don't know what I'm gonna do Without my booo You've been gone for too long It's been fifty-leven days, um-teen hours Imma be burnin' till you return (let it burn)
[Chorus] When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to Even though this might ruin you Let it burn (let it burn, let it burn, you gon' learn) Let it burn (gotta let it burn) Gotta let it burn
Deep down you know its best for yourself but you Hate the thought of her being with someone else But you know that it's over We know that it's through Let it burn Let it burn Gotta let it burn
[Bridge] I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on On the other side I wanna break down and cry (ooooh) I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me that I need to move on On the other side I wanna break down and cry (yeah)
So many days, so many hours I'm still burnin' till you return
[Chorus] When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to Even though this might ruin you Let it burn Let it burn Gotta let it burn
Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you Hate the thought of her being with someone else But you know that it's over We know that it's through Let it burn Let it burn Gotta let it burn
Today's my intervew day but yet I didn't get much sleep yesterday night. Hmm ..Was just informed that I may have to start work immediately, as in today, if I'm selected. That is fast.... Oh well, don't even know if I can get through in the first place. Will see how it goes. Back to yesterday night...Nic (my ex) suddenly smsed and told me that he really missed me alot. Asked if we had chance of patching up. He felt inferior when he was with me and thought that I deserve a better guy, so he didn't really treat me nicely in the past. At least this was his explanation for all the hurt he caused me. Seriously I don't really have much feelings for him anymore, or rather I have already lost faith and trust in him. But somehow, I hate to see him feeling so down. He asked to talk things over, 'cos we never did really resolve our differences. We kinda broke up after an argument. Shall see how my schedule goes first. I think I'm too soft-hearted...
Got a job offer today to work as a sales promoter for Guinness stout in supermarkets. It's not like I'm gonna hard-sell or something. All I need to do is to provide promotional info when anyone takes a look at the stout. Is this an indecent job? I don't have to drink, I don't have to wear scantily. Why is it that so many people think that it's so sleezy? It's not like I'll be in a bar. Does it deserve all these rejections? :roll:
This is probably the last time I'm gonna write about him. I have come to accept the fact that we are not meant to be together. I'm tired. Of thinking what he's feeling, of making him happy. Gonna lead my life as before, think I'll be alot happier. Just let him be a bus stop in my life. Now's time to move on. Not gonna care much about him from now. Yes, it'll be difficult but I know I can do it. I'm definitely not just an empty barrel making noises. So I guess this is goodbye... :(
stop calling me dar... stop showing so much concern, making sure that I take my meals, making sure that I'm happy... stop saying that I'm special or making me feel special... stop telling me that U wanna talk to me... stop all these..unless U really mean it. Because it's hurting me deep inside :cry:
Sel gave me a surprise call yesterday night, around 11 plus or something, and asked if she could stay over for the night. Keke, I thought she was kidding at first. Well, after she came over, we chatted and updated each other till about 2plus before going to sleep. She's got an infected eye due to contact lenses. Hope U'll get better soon, Sel! In the morning, we went to Jurong central,had lunch and shopped alittle at IMM before coming back to my place. Shortly, she left and I went to have a rest. Had dinner with Angela and Joanne at Lau Pa Sat, as scheduled. I enjoyed myself. Sad that Angela is going back to Canada tomorrow, but I know we'll not lose contact. Someday, our paths will surely cross again. :D Was supposed to meet him, but something cropped up, so it was cancelled. Some things he said puzzled me. I really wished I had the courage to ask what is going on and what he treats me as, because of those things....Sometimes I really wonder.....
I spent the whole day tidying, cleaning and shifting the furniture in my room. I had new ideas of the positions of my cupboard, bed etc. It was hard work, with a lot of dust. But I got it done! I'm so proud of myself and my new cozy bedroom. I took...from 10 plus in the morning to about 8pm . Was totally exhausted , and didn't really have much appetite for my dinner. I still ate a little because "he" asked me too. :D Actually, I'm very happy. He told me some stuff that made me feel as though I'm on cloud nine. No, he didn't say he liked me, but it was enough to hear that he felt close to me. I don't wanna go into too much details, just in case. I don't wanna hope too much too, maybe he just feels close, like a brother to a sister. Hmmm...I just can't wait to tell my dear pal, Sel about all this. I'm gonna meet her on Thurs. Hopefully she can make it, since we weren't able to meet for the flea market yesterday afternoon. I've got so much to tell her, and I found out she had alot to update me on too. Of course, this is not the only reason to meet. I want her to share my happiness and sadness, and I miss U, Gal!!! I'm gonna meet my Uni classmates tomorrow for dinner at Lau Pa Sat. Gonna bid farewell to a great friend, Angela. She's going back to Canada on Wed. I'm sure gonna miss her, but we'll definitely keep in contact with each other. I wish her all the best! I'm gonna have a fun time tomorrow. :) Now, I'm gonna wait for his call. I hope he calls, hope he won't fall asleep before first calling.
First of all, here's wishing all mums Happy Mother's Day!
Well, as I mentioned in the previous entry, we went to have dim sum after church today. Yum yum! My favourite har kao and egg tart...drool~~~I think it was great to have a proper meal together as a family too. Dad and Sis are busy with work, and sometimes come home rather late, so it's rare for us to go out to eat as a whole family. Oh, before I forget, today's speaker for the sunday message was good. Her message was short, yet relevant. And most importantly, easy to understand. :) Said hi to my churchmate before I went off. Haha, he;s going to the army soon. Tsk tsk, gotta say goodbye to his "prized" hair. Keke...guys and army and their worries about hairstyle. Haizz..Maybe I'll never understand, but I'm sure glad that I don't have to experience it. Back to lunch, or rather after lunch, we all went Ikea to shop. Woa, bought lots of stuff there for my room. I got new curtains(blue), blue tablecloth, a frame for my 49*70 mosaic jigsaw puzzle, a box container (those big ones) with wheels for my books and a new quilt, which was supposed to be a sofa throw rug but I'll use it as a blanket. :o Spent about $139 in all, got a big hole in my pocket since I paid everything on my own. Nevertheless, I'm very happy. The hard part is to tidy my room, shift the furniture to another position I planned, then I can start making my room into a well-decorated cozy "nest" just for myself.... :wink: Can hardly wait, but I'm tired. Maybe got to wait till tomorrow to tidy. I got the whole day since I do not have to teach tuition till June. *Grin*
Tomorrow's Mother's Day.Gonna have dim sum at the restaurant at Safra with family after church tomorrow to celebrate. What did you people out there buy for your mums? I got her a series of bio-essence products. Phew! Not cheap at all! But well, once in a while, it's alright. :wink: I was asking Sis what she bought for mum. Her reply was that she was busy just now. Geezzz......Well, shall not comment too much about that. She knows what she should do, I hope. My good friend asked me to accompany to the Zouk's flea market . Was thinking how I am gonna be able to make it. (Both events fall in the noon) Luckily, church won't end too late. So I can still go lunch and meet her later for the flea market. It's been rather long since I last saw her, although we're in the same University. Looking forward to having a great time tomorrow. :D
He called me out in the afternoon. Suddenly, I realised we are rather different, and sometimes there are not much things to say to each other. Furthermore, he seems affected when he saw someone today. He hasn't gotten over her yet. One look at his face, I could tell. After he saw her, his mood changed. *Sigh* Well, I'm sad of course, but now that I'm convinced it's impossible, I feel much better. I think he doesn't feel extraordinary chemistry between us, just a familiar buddy feeling. We're not meant to be. This is a disappointing realisation, yet it's a form of relief and liberation for me.
I had the most awful night yesterday. My heart ached like mad, and tears just flowed down uncontrollably. All this just due to a phone call that didn't come. It's a depressing and hurt feeling to like someone but yet he doesn't know. I probably shouldn't blame him since he doesn't know anything. I chose this myself; can't really help it that I feel hurt by him. Was telling myself yesterday as I lay in bed that when my tears stopped flowing, I'll forget that I have feelings for him and ceased to hope. It's morning now. I searched my heart for answers yet again? Have I lost my hope? Did I successfully add another lock to my heart, like I promised myself yesterday night? Actually, I really hope so. Love is better not to be trifled with. It's too dangerous. I'm better left on my own.
I never thought he existed in the world. After being tired of relationships, I finally found someone close to what I consider as ideal. He appeared out of nowhere and shook the lock to my heart. I wouldn't say that I'm crazy about him yet, but I know that I can really fall for this guy. We went out yesterday night. It was sweet; he was sweet. I enjoyed myself , but I find myself wondering if he is too. Certain things that he said made me so happy. But I'm afraid to read too much into the things said. I'm so scared to fall.....
